Or where I am right now.
This website is all about recovery.
Recovery of health
Recovery of happiness
Recovery of wellness.
My original plan was to write about all the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune that have befallen me ( and the family) over the past few years.
After talking incessantly with all sorts of people across a wide range of age groups. Together with reading about other folk’s experiences. I realise that I am, truly, not alone. So rather than a series of moans and groans about everything is “So unfair”, in short - a “Whine Fest” ( see, it even gets to us older folks, too!) I felt that I would rather just outline things in one short post.
After all this is all about a path to recovery.
This would then outline a starting point for the journey.
Just so you know where I am coming from.
I was always a “Clumsy Child”.
Turns out I am very hard of hearing, being totally deaf in my right ear and mostly deaf in my left (I didn’t discover this until a few years ago; I just thought the world was really quiet / aside from the tinnitus, that is/)
I am also, probably one of those ADHD types of personality. (Seeking an official diagnosis)
I’ve spent a lifetime accidentally physically abusing my body in one way or another; I have a thing for all manner of risky activities. All incurred with my usual gusto and aplomb.
It starts a long, long time ago, in early childhood and mostly involves being generally a klutz, falling off horses, being dragged around and never getting it fixed. Falling off buildings whilst carrying out childhood explorations, falling off everything really. This resulted in a left leg that often does as it pleases. This left me open to chronically injuring or re-injuring myself.
Here’s a brief sample of the types of “accidents”
Just plain falling over
Falling out of trees
Falling off walls and buildings
Falling off ponies and horses
Getting my feet stamped on by Horses and Cows
Falling down the stairs
Falling off bicycles
Falling over whilst roller skating/rollerblading
Falling over whilst on the Mountains
Falling off climbing
General damage from kayaking and other risky water related accidents ( even managed to drown, once)
Whiplash from car accidents
Falling off motorcycles
Head injuries - usually incurred whilst being drunk.
Injuring myself at work
Just generally cheating death
That’s really just a sample
I think I can count on my fingers of both hands the number of months that I have actually been injury free during my life.
Most have never been addressed properly (my own arrogance and a natural mistrust of authority) and have merely been “treated “ with copious amounts of Alchohol, Drugs and Hot baths.
None of which really work.
When I have been able to afford it, I have had the odd visit to the Chiropractor and Physiotherapist - usually resulting in me going straight out and injuring myself all over again.
So, how have I actually injured myself. I am lucky, I have only ever broken 1 bone in my body. My big toe on my left foot, when a colleague at a workplace dropped a very heavy metal object onto it. The rest of my injuries are ‘simply’ muscle and tendon related. However….
What am I trying to repair?
Spinal damage from twists and concussive injuries
Here’s a handy gif explains what does what where.
So basically all the way up my spine. I have suffered or continually suffer from all those ailments.
The worst is where I landed on my tailbone and switched off my legs.
Injuries to both wrists, ankles, knees, hips and shoulders from successive falls
Whiplash from car accidents, kayaking and horse riding.
A cerebral stroke affecting the left side of the body, together with A-Fib.
Like a dumbass I went and had 3 of the Covid vaccines which just made everything so much worse. No need to go into all that here as it’s a “banned Subject” on the wider internet.
I have never really been able to sustain a profitable career or hold down a long-term job.
I have always categorised myself as self-employed.
I am a careless risk taker - I have lost a lot of money on dodgy scams and absurd schemes.
Being an optimist I always think the best of every “Business “ Opportunity”
I have owned several businesses. None of which I have managed to sustain to full profitability
I probably, for lots of reasons self-sabotage.
So I have managed to reach near retirement age with very little financial wealth.
Currently I am Economically Inactive. But I’m working on it…
I am naturally an optimistic soul, but I do confess to long bouts of depression. Quite often brought on by the substances I used to deal with the injuries (not to mention, just plain hedonistic tendencies) and the poor thinking associated with that. I have always leaned toward the East, having been a Zen influenced Daoist since the late 1980’s, gently returning fully to that way of life over the last couple of years after a long period of being “lost”.
I have been Alchohol free for over a decade and am currently recovering from overdoing the weed and painkillers. (well, lockdown was boring) I gave up tobacco a long, long time ago.
To Sum up
In short a lifetime of injury has prevented me from enjoying an abundance of health, wealth and happiness. Yet I still have faith in life. What follows are the actions that I am taking to change that. After all I am a mere 63 at the time of writing and I reckon that if I am careful I have years of productivity ahead of me. If you are in a similar situation and feel the same way, let’s wander together and let’s make our lives better. After all
“All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost . . . ”